Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Foreign.
[00:00:15] Speaker B: Hello, everybody. My name is Todd Wall, and welcome to Communication Makeover, where we believe that intentional communication will lead to the breakthrough that you're looking for, both in your business and in your life. Today's problem is something, you know, that every single one of us deal with because it talks about the messiness of life a little bit. Every single one of us go through scenarios, whether it's a relationship issue, a work issue. We're all. Every single one of us are going through something. And so how we move forward, it's these moments where it just feels muddy, it feels sticky. It makes us feel scared to look forward, to move forward, to really evaluate what that next step is. And so really, it comes down to. And here's the real power shift, is how we define those moments, honestly, will determine whether or not we're constantly looking backwards, whether or not we're in that moment, but we're constantly looking side by side because we're escaping, scared. We're scared of what is right around the corner. And it causes us to stay in the shadows. It causes us to hesitate.
Or it's these. Or even how we define that moment will determine whether or not we have the bravery, the courage to step into this new adventure, to step even past sticky moments. Because life is filled with challenges. It's filled with obstacles. It's filled with things that just don't go our way. It's filled with big, scary monsters that make us want to run in the opposite direction. It's filled with giants that we have to overcome. And so we need to refine in our communication. Communication starts with the core of who we are. And so we must define, give ourselves a weapon we can use to be able to step into those very tricky moments. And so I'm bringing on a guest today, Kendra McDowell. And it's very funny because she introduces herself as the boring accountant because she does have an accounting firm, but there's a system of communication that she uses with her clients, even in defining numbers and the obstacles of business, but also translating into the obstacles we face in life in general. And one of the reasons I wanted to bring her on is because how she defines these moments enables her, her family, her clients to be able to see the plane, the situation very clearly and then begin to move forward.
So let me bring her on now. Kendra McDowell. So good to have you on here, Kendra, the boring account. And you see by your. You immediately, everyone. I want everyone to immediately see by the red shirt you're wearing with the beautiful.
The beautiful decoration on it. And they're going to see from your personality. You are not a boring accountant.
So let's talk about this problem a little bit, Kendra, because you have the magic sword for this, the problem that everyone deals with. And it's the difficulty of the moments that we always go through before you even provide the solution. Talk to me about this moment you see with your clients on a consistent basis that just causes that hesitation or even them going into the negative cycle over and over and over again. What are you seeing on a consistent basis with your clients?
[00:04:24] Speaker A: Yeah, I see. First of all, I think, and I would say maybe 90% of my job is really just encouraging my client to make the decision. I always say I'm as only as good as you believe. And I think that individuals and entrepreneurship and, you know, that are running their small business, they want the microwave, right? They want that instant gratification. And then when they don't see that, it shows up in their financial statements. When they don't see that it shows up in their work or they hit a wall, then they start to feel bad, and then I have to build them back up. But I always say that entrepreneurship is a journey, and within that journey, we're going to have what I coin as ohs. Ohs are these obstacles and situations that show up in our life just to, I say, guide us along and also to remind us that we are strong, determined, and resilient, and we have the power within. But some of us have to. I mean, that's why it's so important to communicate, right? Because, you know, it's in communication with someone else that when your light feels dim, they can share and brighten that light back.
[00:05:38] Speaker B: I love that, and I love the intentionality of labeling that, and I want to go deeper with that. But these moments, like, talk to me where you came up with this, the idea of the aho. Because this is something that I really want to dwell. This is something we all identify with. I really want us to dwell in that moment of. That moment of hesitation or that cycle of. I just keep repeating that negative cycle over and over again. I keep getting back in the mud. Talk to me about that cycle or that mud feeling that the clients have been feeling.
[00:06:13] Speaker A: Yeah. So when I came up with the ohs and the ohs of life, Right. It was just. Just from experience. And I just felt like, even for myself, you know, because you always focus on, you know, you're your best experiment. And I realized that these ohs of life, they had, like, meaning. So, like, say, for instance, you know, clients, right? Now they're facing so many different things with the economy, with, you know, the service, with the products, and you know it. And then not only that, if there's things going on in their personal life, your relationship with your accountant is going to be so transparent because we get the keys to the castle. Right? And so it's always good when a person can bring their whole self, you know, there. So going into some of that muckiness can feel like doubt, regret, shame, embarrassment, then all of a sudden joy, happiness. So you have this bundle of emotion, and that's what I call the O's of life. They're the experiences, they're the emotions that sometimes we don't allow ourselves to have because society has taught us that sadness, no, you can't be sad. But we learned that sadness brings joy. So. So we sometimes want to look at bad things as bad things. But it's sometimes those things that turn us in the right direction. Like the gps, you make a wrong turn and then we're going to recalculate and like turn around. Sometimes it might say u turn or it might say, you know, go 15 miles here. But nevertheless, it does, you know, put us back on. And I think that in business and in that journey, it's not made for the week. So you have to have that communication. And I just like being, you know, rolling up front and not really sugarcoat being optimistic.
[00:08:09] Speaker B: Right, right.
[00:08:10] Speaker A: You know, but it's just being that, you know, there's four seasons that we experience here and you're going to experience different seasons.
[00:08:18] Speaker B: You know, what I, what I love is because I look forward again, I look forward to getting into the power of this tool. But when you feel those, that shame, we feel the, you know, the I didn't do, even in the simple context of like, you're dealing, I overspent my budget or I didn't keep that receipt simple. Sometimes simple things, they cause us to go backwards. It causes to hide. They cause us to. How often have you even seen with your accounting clients where they did the same mistake again? And they, they, they don't come to their meetings, they don't show up to their appointments with you because they don't want that accountability moment. They don't. They feel like someone's going to throw a rock in.
[00:09:02] Speaker A: Right. So I just had a new client actually that experienced this. She had lost her fiance and her business had, of course, unraveled. And so when we had our first meeting, I said, dear, life happened. You were in trauma. When you're in trauma time doesn't exist. So, of course you were grieving and you had to allow yourself to do that. I said, but you're not that far that we can't get you back into compliance. And I think sometimes individuals need that reassurance because she was just so ready to be judged. And she was like, well, yeah, you know, I haven't done this, and, you know, I haven't even, you know, put out my W2s. And I said, but you're taking the first step.
Because she wanted to keep. She wanted to cancel, actually. And I don't know, I just got a vibe from her, and I said, I'm here. I'll see you soon. And when she got here, you know, I told her, I said, I know he wanted to cancel, because like you said, it's facing it. You know, it's the fear, facing the unknown.
[00:10:03] Speaker B: I love that. So. So, Kendra, stick with me. And we're in the next segment.
[00:10:06] Speaker A: We're.
[00:10:06] Speaker B: We're going to talk more about how to use these tools. So. So. So stick with me. Kendra, for those. Those of you out there, I really. I want you to really take this moment to evaluate this and think through these moments where you did go backwards, you did hide. You were afraid of that accountability, like they were going to throw a rock in your face. But I want you to hear the intentionality that Kendra was talking about here. By intentionally, she. She gave a clear bridge from point A to point B, and it was different than the negative outcome that was that people were afraid of. Oftentimes, that bridge that. That gets you past that gap is not as big as you think it is.
Most times, it's just about. You just need to step over that little mud puddle. But that mud puddle can feel like an ocean of mud. It can feel like someone has a boulder. Like that old Bugs. All the old Bugs Bunny commercials or cartoons I grew up with, where there's that. That Acme anvil that's over your head that's ready to drop on you at any moment, it's probably not true. It probably just feels that way. And so in the next segment, we're going to start stepping into how we define that moment will determine how you react and how you move forward.
So stick with us, because this is going to get better and better. We must find a way to keep moving forward. Stick with us. We'll be right back.
Hello, everyone. My name is Todd Wahl, and welcome to Communication Makeover, where we believe that intentional communication will lead to the breakthrough that you're looking for. Both in your business and in your life, Every single one of us go through these moments. You know, these moments that either they give us feelings of shame, they give us feelings of fear, of anxiety, of. You know, it's like these. You know, these moments were like, I don't want anybody to know about this, but we have to move forward. These moments can either. These are critical junctures that will either allow us to move forward in life or, unfortunately, move backwards in life.
What if those moments are causing us to hide in areas that are actually the key to enable us to move forward?
And so my guest today is Kendra McDowell. She hides in her daily life as an accountant with an accounting firm. And she calls herself the boring accountant, which I always laugh when I say, because she's the complete opposite of that. But through the turmoil of life, she's developed a concept and a series of tools that she uses with her clients to be able to help them quickly define the moment and move past the moment, to give hope in that situation by defining what is actually going on. When we define that moment, we take power and control of that moment again. And so let me bring her on. Kendra, so good to have you on again. And so, Kendra, let's talk through these. These oh moments. And so. And so you've got a series of books and the website, the Adventures of the oh Moments. Talk to me and tell us a little bit about first how you got to that, because that's going to help us understand how valuable this tool is. And so talk to us a little bit how you came to this label of oh moments.
[00:14:24] Speaker A: Yeah, so my family and I, we had experienced some things, and, you know, I felt like I was going to despair. And it was at that moment that I felt like I needed something, you know, just something outside. And so my outlet is journaling. And so it was at that point that I'm like, I'm experiencing what I call the O's of life. This is what it is. And what I'm experiencing is fear, you know, false evidence appearing real. And it was at that point, you know, you're going to be your best, you know, test. Right. And it was at that point that I had to use that, the ohs of life, the oh moments to keep bridging. And it's a continued process. It doesn't stop there.
[00:15:17] Speaker B: You're absolutely. I love the intentionality. So let's start at the beginning. You were at that moment where you were going to that deep place, and you weren't. You weren't just letting the moment happen to you.
[00:15:30] Speaker A: Right.
[00:15:30] Speaker B: You. You. The beginning to take control of that moment was you defining it.
[00:15:36] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:15:37] Speaker B: And so because you, you saw the negativity that was pulling you back is going into.
You said the feeling of desolation.
And, and you said, nuh, we can't, we can't. We can't let this happen. So is that the first step is recognizing I can't let this happen?
[00:15:55] Speaker A: Yeah. And sometimes someone else. Because I know for me, like, you know, being an accountant, you have. It's. It's methodical. You can do it with your eyes closed because it's so routine. And when I would get home, that's when my subconscious would remind me what was going on. And I remember one day my dad came over. He's like, every time I come over, you're on the couch. And it was that aha. The aha moment where I was like, I am. Because I even realize it. So sometimes it's not only you recognizing, but it's just being keen to hear what others are saying and not always taking it as a bad thing, but. But like really saying, wow, I have been. And then that's when I realized.
[00:16:33] Speaker B: So I heard you say a couple very powerful things. One, you said not taking it as a bad thing, but this almost radical observation, being willing to observe and hear the observations of other people.
People I've. I've. I heard on another show on NOW Media that talking about self awareness. There's that internal self awareness, but then external self awareness as well. How are other people actually seeing you? You have to be open to both of those.
It sounds like that was the first critical step in this Pat, in using this definition was, am I really observing this situation clearly? Because you didn't realize you were hiding on the couch.
[00:17:19] Speaker A: No. I mean, my mind was just like. Like an ADHD brain.
And I'm just sitting there, just sucking it all in, frozen.
And he's like, wow, come over. And that's when I realized that I had went to despair. That was a defining. And I was like, I gotta get out of here because I have my family depending on it. And then that's when, you know, I realized that I have to find joy in the moments. And sometimes I'm a little bit, maybe too optimistic, but I'd rather be way over there than. Because I always. I was like, God, if you just allow me to smile, I just want to feel good.
[00:18:00] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:02] Speaker A: And I promised him. I'm like, I promise you, I would be Mary Poppins.
[00:18:09] Speaker B: I love that.
You know, if I can Observe what, what you, you went through in that one. You were willing to have other people come on the journey with you.
[00:18:20] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:18:20] Speaker B: And. And so a lot of times when we're. We have that fear, shame, desolation, we push everybody away. So the courage to allow other people to come shoulder to shoulder with us, that's the first thing. But then you said you recognize what was at stake. And I think it's very important that people recognize what's at stake within. I mean, if you're just turning on a movie and there's not something at stake, you change the movie. What if that's true about our life as well? You said, my family is counting on me.
Boy, that was rocket fuel, I bet, to your soul, wasn't it?
[00:19:00] Speaker A: Yeah. You know, and I was like, okay, I need to get my energy right. And then that's when I started doing cardio. Not, not just really like going out there exercising, but just giving my body enough, like just flushing the system.
[00:19:13] Speaker B: Flushing the system, you know, and it.
[00:19:15] Speaker A: Was during that moment because when you do that, your heart gets to beating and then it's. And it's at that moment that you don't feel anything. Right. Because your body resetting itself. And so that was kind of part of what I would say, my healing journey in dealing with the messy moments of life and just embracing that these are the O's of life and that my experience is going to be helping someone else. I had no idea that I would be helping the world with it. Right, yeah.
Code experiment. And you know, it wasn't to cause me to fail. It was just caused me to recognize, to see, to be able to see myself through and to be able to embrace. I think a lot of times individuals don't face things because.
[00:20:03] Speaker B: Right.
[00:20:03] Speaker A: If I avoid it, it'll go away.
Even from, like watching superhero movies. Right. They go there and even if they punch right, they still get up. And it's the getting up, it's just showing up. And even if you have to take a moment to be like we, but you showed up. And I think that once you start doing that, it's like something magical happens.
All of a sudden the road appears.
[00:20:34] Speaker B: It really does. I heard you say you have to create motion. So even the cardio is just something that physically where I'm not moving backwards, I'm not hiding, I'm going to create action in motion forward. And I love the power of even the whimsical label you put on. And I think there's a lot of power in giving things whimsical names because the emotions make these situations feel way larger than they actually are. It's just like the shadow. Our shadows oftentimes get four, five, six times larger than us. And we think it's just. It's just an illusion. Right. These problems feel bigger than they actually are. And so this whimsical label that you gave almost puts it back into proportion. It's like, oh, this is actually manageable, isn't it?
[00:21:32] Speaker A: Huh? Yeah. And that was just changing perception, right? Yeah. Once I was like, oh, it's a messy moment and it will pass just like a season. You know, it's going to snow, but as soon as it snows, eventually the temperature goes up, like there's a cycle.
[00:21:51] Speaker B: You know, I even heard when you described the story initially, when you just gave it that label, it's like the weight lifted off.
[00:22:00] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:22:00] Speaker B: It's like, oh, okay, take me to that place. Describe that better for me about that. Once you wrote it down, you go, oh, oh, tell me about that.
[00:22:13] Speaker A: Yeah. So when I was able to, like, put it in perspective and to say that I'm experiencing the odds of life, I was able to say, okay, what's the problem here? What am I feeling? And then I think that's when my creative brain, you know, just started writing. And I think individuals have to find their outlet, like a healthy outlet. And so, like, writing for me. And it was kind of weird because the universe didn't let me sit down either, because it was also during that time that I received a call to, oh, let's do a podcast, and, oh, let's do these things. And so as I started moving forward, the universe met me there too. And so it was a tug of war because it's like, oh, my God, I have to show up and do this. So I didn't have chance to go to the despair even if I wanted to. And I just realized that the O's of life is really just realizing that you're strong, you're determined, you're resilient, and that you have to just look, look at it. Okay. If this is a problem. So, like, say, if it's a financial problem, okay, what can I do? You know, what can I do to solve it? What's the worst this can happen? What's the best that can happen if I, you know, hold your head up, you know? And I think that when people are experiencing things, you know, there's, like you said, shame that comes with it. But when you realize that you are going through a moment, a moment, think of it like that. I'm just experiencing this for the moment.
[00:23:44] Speaker B: It gets smaller. I love that.
Kendra, stick with us. I need to jump to commercial break. We will be right back. All right, everybody, in the immortal words of. Of Vanilla Ice, when there's a situation, yo, I'll solve it. And these tools are the way to get through that, that mindset that makes that problem go from big down to small. Stick with us. We'll be right back.
[00:24:21] Speaker A: Foreign.
[00:24:28] Speaker B: Hello, everybody. Welcome to Communication Makeover, where we believe that intentional communication will lead to the breakthrough that you're looking for, both in your business and in your life. The problem we're working on today, really, it's a common problem because we all deal with a. A situation that makes us scared, afraid, want to go backwards, want to hide, feeling those feelings of shame and having a specific tool to be able to make that problem go from what feels like an enormous giant to something that's smaller that we can manage. And we go, oh, that's nothing. I can get. I can get through that. All I need now to do is X, y, and Z. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.
Intentional communication is what takes the giants of this world down to easy peasy lemon squeezy. You hear even how whimsical I said that phrase, easy peasy lemon squeezy, meaning when we shrink these moments into something that our brain can process, then we're not afraid of it anymore. You even look at the biblical example of David and Goliath. David said that the giant is big. He said, but my God is even bigger, meaning he was able to shrink the size of that giant problem. It's the same scenario. You just have to label the problem differently. I'm enjoying this conversation with Kendra McDowell. And again, you're seeing she labels herself the boring accountant, but she's far from that. Yes, she has an accounting firm, and yes, she helps businesses with her numbers. Yes. But in. When you deal with the numbers in a business, businesses are complicated, and there are problems that you have to figure out a solution to move past? And she's discovered a method, both in business and in family life and in personal life, working one on one with clients. How do you get past these sticky moments that make you want to run and hide, that make you want to isolate yourself instead? How do you build the bridge in order to move forward? So let me bring her on now. Kendra. Well, I'm really loving this conversation that we're having.
And so these, uh, oh, moments we talked in the last segment about how you you were in this moment of desolation. You sat down with a journal. Yet in other words, you did the deep work. You heard from your dad, who was standing beside you, recognizing the pattern at play. So you brought people into your life, you listened to them. You didn't get defensive. And then you said, oh, what I'm experiencing is our oh moments. And when you labeled it, you were able to get up, create action, and begin moving forward. So where.
Talk to me in some of the specific situations you've seen, whether in your personal life or with clients in business, where this tool of labeling something, the oh moment, has enabled someone to move forward.
What's the first thing that comes to mind there of how these, the power of these oh moments?
[00:27:57] Speaker A: I mean, I just used it with my daughter, my youngest daughter last night. My youngest son, he has a girlfriend now. My daughter was like, I can't do. She said, I looked on his cell phone and our picture is not there anymore. And so I have three adult children then I have an elementary age, you know, my daughter. And so I had said to her, I said, you just experienced an oh moment, honey. And the emotion that's coming up is jealousy. You're always going to be your brother, apple in his eye, but he's an adult and he has to find love too. But he's just going to love differently. I said, so you can embrace it, but this is a chance for you to understand and also learn that you're never going to be replaced in anyone's life.
[00:28:43] Speaker B: Wow. So by bringing in the label, this, this is just an oh moment that allowed you to bring in words of wisdom and defining it.
So, so what that helps me recognize is the, the emotions of the moment create a fog that limits us from being able to define the moment.
So you by, by using the label, it removed the fog in order and you were able to write on, in an inscription on a very critical place in her life. How we define those moments will determine if I move forward wounded or if I move forward with power. I love that. Where else have you seen this come out?
[00:29:30] Speaker A: And I just have to just say this. It was so funny seeing my 7 year old. Like, I can't deal. This is stress, right? But, you know, I see it with my clients. You know, I had one client, they were going through a distressful moment. A family member went missing and, you know, was causing a lot of distress. And, you know, my advice to them was, you know, you're experiencing a moment and, you know, pray, you know, ask God, but be okay with not being okay and be okay to accept what the answer is sometimes what we think the answer should be, and how God delivers the answers to totally different things. But, you know, I always like to believe, and that's kind of how the ohs are. And they're. And they're also, like, summarize moments, too. So, like, say, for instance, if you're having this kind of oh, then there's, you know, a chapter that would kind of walk through different tips and tools, affirmations, and, you know, things like that. But just summarizing and going back to the client, and I think that he was able to embrace that. And he stopped by my office, and he was like, she had passed. And so it was.
It was a sad day. But it was also. He had at least knew where his sister was. And so, you know, she had slipped and fell and. Yeah. So at least, you know, they have clothes.
[00:31:04] Speaker B: Yeah. And even by providing the label and recognizing the moment, even. Even if it is in the whimsical way, it sounds like we also need to be careful, the weight of those moments to where we're not trivializing, because you didn't trivialize in that moment, but you gave perspective. And tell me what you think of this, Kendra, with my clients, I often say, regardless of your view of the future, we're often in a parenthesis moment. And this unique parenthesis moment requires me to believe in a certain way and act in a certain way so that I can get into the other side of that parentheses of this equation. You probably like talking in equation and numbers, so. So I need to believe in a certain way and act in a certain way to get to the other end of this parentheses. So it sounds like whatever tool we can use in order to get through that. What do you think of that parentheses moment?
[00:32:05] Speaker A: Oh, my God. Yes. You have to have that. I think that life is science. Life is numbers. And I think that, you know, if you want a result, you have to. You don't do anything. I mean, just think of it. If we had water here and we left it out days after days, it would become yuck, you know, ick. Right. We wouldn't want to drink it. But if you take a fresh water, you know, you want to drink it. So I think that if you look at it from a formula, like, say, for instance, I'm dissatisfied. Right. Let that be part of the formula. So because I'm dissatisfied, I have to figure out what I need to add to my dissatisfaction in order to change it. If we're formalizing it. Okay. I need to have above average thoughts because if I'm dissatisfied, I have to change my thinking, I have to think differently, and I have to be willing to experience. A lot of individuals don't realize it's opportunity costs. So to come up with a concept, to even be able to formalize it, there was a heavy price to pay. And not a lot of individuals want to pay that price in order to become part of that formula. They want to, oh, no, I don't want to experience that. I don't want to experience this. And I believe the power of the words is either going to bring you forward or bring you back. And you don't want to get trapped in that equation. You want to be able to move it forward.
[00:33:28] Speaker B: One of the things I really love about what you're saying is because it's the emotions of the moment that make it feel like the giant's bigger than it actually is. So even approaching each moment, giving, giving that label helps us move past the emotion. Just like with your daughter, pass the emotion to be able to go, A plus B equals C.
Is that is, that is. You see that same trend. It helps us remove the emotions of the moment.
[00:33:59] Speaker A: Yeah, you're identifying what that is, and then you're adding to like, okay, what can I. How can I look at that? And then when you put that together with a solution, then you're going to get an outcome that is going to be moving you forward.
And guess what? There might be another oh moment. I mean, and I think we have to realize that we're here to solve problems.
[00:34:23] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:34:23] Speaker A: That's what on earth. Right. To solve problems. And that doesn't evade us.
[00:34:28] Speaker B: Would it be fair to say? I mean, because I think most people are afraid of math. I think that's why your, your job exists. But most of the problems we need to walk through aren't calculus. There actually are simple math or simple addition. Maybe there's somebody, somebody we need to subtract from our lives. But it's typically simple formulas and not calculus.
[00:34:51] Speaker A: Right, Right. And even in relationships. Right. And that could be, you know, whether it's a family relationship, a marriage, a romantic relationship. You know, if someone is not adding value, are you being devalued? It's at those points that you really have to accept, you know, you really have to think. And I think sometimes it's so, it's so calming for us humans to be like, well, I'm comfortable here and I know what I'm gonna get. Because the new is always, you know, who wants to Change. Right. Change kind of, you know, bridges fear and anxiety. But in order for.
For the problem to be resolved and not return. Right. We don't want to have to keep recycling the problem. We want to be able to have resilience. So if you do experience something similar, Similar, it's like, oh, yeah, you know, that's easy. Absolutely.
[00:35:51] Speaker B: Kendra, stick with us because in our next segment, I want us to move from oh to aha and talk about these aha moments because it's. We have to be just as intentional there. So stick with me. All right, everybody. I love the basics of removing the emotion and breaking things down into a simple formula and seeing things without the emotion. Because when we remove the emotion and we lay out the steps, I see this with my clients over and over again. When we remove the emotion and we break it down into basic steps, we know how to do this. You know how to get through this problem. We use a label that removes the emotion so I can see it clearly. And now I have the steps moving forward. Stick with us. Let's move to the aha moments right after this.
[00:36:53] Speaker A: Foreign.
[00:36:58] Speaker B: My name is Todd Wahl. Welcome to Communication Makeover, where we believe that intentional communication will lead to the breakthrough that you're looking for both in your business and in your life. We've been walking through the steps we talk about in our breakthrough method of awareness and discovery. And you heard Kendra talk about this recognition of.
Of. Of that what was she was actually feeling. Discovering what was actually going on by allowing people to come into her life but then taking control of the moment. She did the pre work that was necessary so that she could be completely in the moment. I loved how we began to isolate. The moments we go through are filled with emotions that make us want to run. But using these labels to define the moment help us remove the emotions so that ultimately we see a very clear formula that's in front of us. Oh, all I need to do is X, y and Z. Now, if this label is what takes the emotion away in order for us to move forward, there's also another end of the equation, that end of the equation that helps us really define who do we want to be going forward, what is the outcome that we're really looking for and when we feel it. And I say this with my clients all the time, when we're onto something, it's going to feel like that perfect outfit you put on from the mall and you're going to go, yes, this is it. I feel it. This is me. This is who I am. And all the emotions go through it. That's an aha moment. It's that emotion that then moves you forward. It's that Mario Kart Turbo Arrows that if you go over this, as soon as you hit that moment. Yes. Bam. Here we go. It's our. My Turbo. It's that aha moment. So I'm going to step. I'm going to bring Kendra back on, because she is so much more than just a boring accountant. She can help you with her numbers, with your numbers, but it's getting through these moments in your business and in your life. That's the power of everything else. Let me bring her on. Kendra, let's keep talking through these. So we've defined the aha moments, and we've defined that it removes the emotion to be able to see clearly the steps that we need in order to get past that. But then that the next label that you use, oh, so often is the aha moment.
[00:39:54] Speaker A: Tell me.
[00:39:55] Speaker B: Tell me about that. Define that for me.
[00:39:57] Speaker A: So the aha moment is when you get to the. When you have pivoted to the place to say that, I'm bigger than this oh moment. And now I can see this aha. It's like a solution, right? You're at the solution. And it's usually at that point when you tell yourself, I don't want to feel like this again. I don't want to be in this place again. And so I need to strategically figure this out. Like, how can I not be here? So aha moment is going to be where you are.
I always like to tell people this when you're, like, bridging from the oh moment to the aha moment, you have to tell yourself all is well. And sometimes just hearing that and silencing that is like, okay. And then when you're in that aha moment, that's when you're actually doing those action items. So, like, if you're in an aha moment of your business and the partnership, say, fell apart, now it's like, okay, how do we dissolve this and how do we move forward and what does that look like? Because you don't want to get trapped in any of those segments. You want to keep moving forward, and no matter what it looks like, keep moving forward. Aha moments are there to greet you, reward you for the experience, to let you know that the answer was here all the time. But you had to go from A to B to C to get here, to see it and to realize it.
[00:41:28] Speaker B: It's still that same aspect of when we remove the Negative emotions. It allows that rocket fuel that we were designed to ingest to come within our soul, our spirit, and our minds that really move us forward. I heard you say when you recognize the aha moment, it's a permission moment.
[00:41:49] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:41:50] Speaker B: Talk to me about the permission that is needed to be able to move forward.
[00:41:56] Speaker A: Yeah, it's surprising, but so many individuals don't feel worthy. They don't feel deserving. They are just like, I don't know how I'm gonna do it. I give you an example with a client. I had a client that she was going through a divorce, and, you know, she just felt so stuck with the O's of life and that oh moment. And then I said, hey, listen, sell the house, rent you, you know, a townhome, and then you'll see the way clear. A little bit later, when she got to her aha moment, she was like, you know what? Selling the house was the best thing. I didn't realize that. I didn't want to be there with the memories. And she felt energized to really move on. And although there were pitfalls, right. Because there were moments when she would have her husband to hang a picture on the wall. Now she's like, oh, my God, what do I do? So having that aha moment is allowing yourself to say, I made the best decision that I know at this moment. I'm doing the best that I can do. And no matter what or how anyone perceives this, I know all is well.
[00:43:02] Speaker B: All is well. And that. I think that leads me to the. The second part of the benefit of this. It's that aha moment. You're defining what just happened. So many times good things happen. But. And we just, like, we're so used to dwelling on the negative, it just goes. It just. We just let it go on past it. But that defining it and putting a stake in the ground of. So that I remember this moment.
So how does. How can a person define that moment? Talk to me a little bit more on defining the aha moment. So we talked about the permission, the permission to move forward. But then the real power is in how I define it. So talk to me a little bit more about defining that aha.
[00:43:54] Speaker A: Yeah. So the aha moment is taking you to your resilience, right? And you're going to know you're at that aha moment because you're going to be so resilient, and you are now appearing bigger than your problem. Because whether or not you like the outcome, you're like, you know what? I'm bigger than that. So the aha moment is going to look like a conclusion is going to look like, solution is going to look like. And it's going. You're going to feel brave, you're going to feel courage, you're going to feel momentum, and it's going to look differently depending on what area you're in. So if you're in an area of business and you're at that aha moment, the aha moment is going to say, okay, we can project that in six months, we can recover from this situation. And then we knew we can kind of reflect back to see why did this business get in this situation in the first place. And we can plan and move forward and then, you know, check in with that on a monthly basis. So the aha moment is really the. The how. How can I describe it better? Is going to be that, like, you know, I arrived.
Yeah, yeah.
[00:45:08] Speaker B: You know, something else I heard in that is, I think through different aha moments, I think about a client who had a. They were having some different problems in their business, and the aha moment was recognizing what kept tripping them up. So it was interesting by identifying that aha actually bought them more patience with the moment. Then they're like, oh, aha, now I see. I see. And I've actually fixed it. So now, like I heard you define a person being able to see a broader and longer view of the moment because of how they defined the aha. So talk to me a little bit about how increases your perspective and your view of the moment.
[00:45:56] Speaker A: Yeah, I think that after you experience an oh moment and you're transitioning to the aha now, it could have been a lot of time that you have been in that oh moment. So it's not a quick, easy fix. Right. And so it's like by the time you get to that aha moment, you know, you have been through so much. You might have felt beaten down, you might have felt, you know, anxious, you might have felt depressed, might have felt like a failure. So when you're getting to the aha moment, it's like all that is falling off. It's like you're becoming the superhero. You. You're becoming the better version of you. You're becoming the person that can look back and say that, yeah, I experienced these things, but in this aha moment, I realized that I had arrived. When I can look back, accept what had happened, and embrace where I am, and then overcome everything.
[00:46:56] Speaker B: That is such a beautiful view. Looking back, accepting being in the moment, and then moving Forward in the emotions, the fog of the emotions make that feel so much more complicated than what you just laid out. Step one, step two, and step three, being able to see forward, that fog, it even hides our feet. We don't even know what that next step is.
So if you think about even a person who isn't able to see, they have someone who takes them by the arm and says, you have a little step up. There's a curb here. They define it. And so just a little step up so they know what to expect, and then they lift up, and all of a sudden they're on a different place. It's not. But now if no one said, no one labeled, you have a curb here, then they're going to keep kicking it and falling, kicking, falling, kicking, falling, and never moving forward. Because no one said, all you have to do is lift. Just a tiny. It's six inches up. Just lift your foot six inches up. That's it. And that's not emotional?
[00:48:10] Speaker A: No, not. And I think another thing, too. Individuals don't realize that they're. They. Sometimes these situations can make you feel like you're the only one. One. And I, you know, I can say, listen, trust me, you're not the only one. You know, this is the normal. And I think that also helps, too, because the perception, right, the perception of why I'm here, the perception of why am I experiencing this? And sometimes we are like, why, why, why, why? Why me? Right? But it's like, this is a common experience. And I always, especially when we're using this in the business context with my clients. Entrepreneurship is a journey. You can read about any entrepreneur and they went through a journey.
[00:48:55] Speaker B: And just like any adventure, you've got to define the dragon and you got to move forward. Kendra, this is so powerful. I loved how. How we walk through each stage of this. And so anybody that works with you either for numbers, they're going to get this, too. And so anyone who works with you is going to benefit from this. So, Kendra, thank you so much for the time, and I hope to have you on the show again in the future.
[00:49:20] Speaker A: Yes, thank you for having me.
[00:49:22] Speaker B: Absolutely. All right, everybody, let's define that moment. Let's find even a whimsical way. If you need to call it an OS moment and you need to go there, do it.
Find a label, a way that you can be able to lower the emotion, see the situation as it actually is, and get the vision to move forward. The practical steps are right in front of you. All right? Be intentional, stay courageous. And let's keep moving forward. We'll see you next week.
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